Heart Space #40: 1st Trip back from Trinidad & Tobago.
I am writing this blog on board the 2nd leg flight home from Frankfurt to Singapore, SQ025. Actually it’s the 3rd and final leg, for the first leg was from Port of Spain, Trinidad to New York, JFK. A lot of events have happened and finally led to us taking this unscheduled trip home. In summary, the country that we are serving, is calling for an abrupt election, and considering that my work involves a lot of engagements with the ministries and public, it was deemed inconvenient to continue. The circumstances that we were made to leave soon as possible had left a bitter taste in my mouth.
Notwithstanding that, I wanted to blog about my experience thus far in a new type of job, a new role and in a new country.
I got into this job without knowing what the job exactly is, where I’ll be posted and whether I am even sufficiently trained or experienced to do it. In fact the sentiment of “misfit” is shared amongst many, if not all of my colleagues. I did think, why me then? Was it because I was willing to travel over 9500 miles to do a job that few family men, even lesser women would take? Or was it because my past job experience has some remote relevance to the type of people that they hire? To further add to the mystery, I was assigned to a Reporting Officer (RO) that is so way high up and in a ‘segment’ of the workforce that requires long term posting.
As I got into the job, these thoughts fade quickly into the background. The urge to do a good job, to prove a point took over or it could just me trying simply to make the best out of it. Honestly, I do not have a yardstick on how I am doing or I am doing it right. I believe that I am doing things the right way, and so far, my lead has not said anything in disagreement or shown signs of discontent. With the scope continuing to expand, and lessening of resources and time, I would expect that the following weeks will be up to my neck, and therefore I am trying to pen this out while I can.
On the personal side of things, one could not imagine how much more difficult it actually is to leave your family behind and be separated in a distant land for work. I am not the ‘hero’ that some of my friends make me out to be. Sometimes in life, we are presented with an opportunity and we just have to take it, regardless if it was the best time or not. Would I have done it other way, since I have been in this job 3 months? I really do not know the answer, although there are times that I was dead sure of what the answer would be. Don’t get me wrong, I like the nature of the job, the experience that I get working in developing countries, the sparse travelling I have during my leisure time, but is it worth it? Do these all merit my time away from the people that I love so dearly? Is being there constitute same “value” as trying to provide them adequately? Spare me the lecture about inequitable comparisons, but my point is that is being there all the time and not working hard for the family, is that love? Having said this, I know there are other viable options in providing for the family, (and forgive me for being selfish), I do need to balance the needs of the family with my career aspirations. I am blessed with a wonderful and understanding wife whom without, it would be impossible to pull this off. Nonetheless, I constantly bear the thought, that I will not advance a single step without her blessings, and I made sure she knows it.
It seems that I have already written quite a bit and getting jet lag already up in the skies. It would be about 8 hours more of flight time, and 8 hours more before I can see my babies again. I will enjoy 20 odd days I have in Singapore and at the same time juggling work. Meanwhile, back to my Krisworld entertainment movies…. Oh yea, I just bought something (a first) in the air, and it’s for the mother of my baby, and for the 7th year anniversary of wedding.
I am writing this blog on board the 2nd leg flight home from Frankfurt to Singapore, SQ025. Actually it’s the 3rd and final leg, for the first leg was from Port of Spain, Trinidad to New York, JFK. A lot of events have happened and finally led to us taking this unscheduled trip home. In summary, the country that we are serving, is calling for an abrupt election, and considering that my work involves a lot of engagements with the ministries and public, it was deemed inconvenient to continue. The circumstances that we were made to leave soon as possible had left a bitter taste in my mouth.
Notwithstanding that, I wanted to blog about my experience thus far in a new type of job, a new role and in a new country.
I got into this job without knowing what the job exactly is, where I’ll be posted and whether I am even sufficiently trained or experienced to do it. In fact the sentiment of “misfit” is shared amongst many, if not all of my colleagues. I did think, why me then? Was it because I was willing to travel over 9500 miles to do a job that few family men, even lesser women would take? Or was it because my past job experience has some remote relevance to the type of people that they hire? To further add to the mystery, I was assigned to a Reporting Officer (RO) that is so way high up and in a ‘segment’ of the workforce that requires long term posting.
As I got into the job, these thoughts fade quickly into the background. The urge to do a good job, to prove a point took over or it could just me trying simply to make the best out of it. Honestly, I do not have a yardstick on how I am doing or I am doing it right. I believe that I am doing things the right way, and so far, my lead has not said anything in disagreement or shown signs of discontent. With the scope continuing to expand, and lessening of resources and time, I would expect that the following weeks will be up to my neck, and therefore I am trying to pen this out while I can.
On the personal side of things, one could not imagine how much more difficult it actually is to leave your family behind and be separated in a distant land for work. I am not the ‘hero’ that some of my friends make me out to be. Sometimes in life, we are presented with an opportunity and we just have to take it, regardless if it was the best time or not. Would I have done it other way, since I have been in this job 3 months? I really do not know the answer, although there are times that I was dead sure of what the answer would be. Don’t get me wrong, I like the nature of the job, the experience that I get working in developing countries, the sparse travelling I have during my leisure time, but is it worth it? Do these all merit my time away from the people that I love so dearly? Is being there constitute same “value” as trying to provide them adequately? Spare me the lecture about inequitable comparisons, but my point is that is being there all the time and not working hard for the family, is that love? Having said this, I know there are other viable options in providing for the family, (and forgive me for being selfish), I do need to balance the needs of the family with my career aspirations. I am blessed with a wonderful and understanding wife whom without, it would be impossible to pull this off. Nonetheless, I constantly bear the thought, that I will not advance a single step without her blessings, and I made sure she knows it.
It seems that I have already written quite a bit and getting jet lag already up in the skies. It would be about 8 hours more of flight time, and 8 hours more before I can see my babies again. I will enjoy 20 odd days I have in Singapore and at the same time juggling work. Meanwhile, back to my Krisworld entertainment movies…. Oh yea, I just bought something (a first) in the air, and it’s for the mother of my baby, and for the 7th year anniversary of wedding.
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